A follow up question for YOU about the inevitable “Crash”

There was just a question asking whether someone has to actually ‘crash’ before they admit that they have bipolar and seek help (http://www.askabipolar.com/do-you-believe-the-last-resort-for-someone-in-denial-to-realize-they-have-bi-polar-disorder-is-to-crash/ ) So this got me thinking… Did I have to crash??? What made me seek help??? My answers got kind of confusing…

I first got help because my mom forced me when I was 11-no crash… But, like Marybeth said, I wasn’t getting help for me, so it didn’t work… I went through the motions for a while, then I crashed… So I started actually working… Then I crashed again… And again… And again… (etc, etc, etc…) And what made me seek help??? So many things, so many different times… I go through my cycles where I want to help myself, and where I don’t… But that’s normal for most people still struggling with their bipolar (right??? Please say I’m right…) But it’s been more than that for me… I’ve literally had many ‘crashes…’ I’ve ended up in the hospital so many times, I lost count after 15… I keep completely giving up and trying to kill myself or just disappear or something… I’m still going through this…

So, after all my goings-on… Here’s my question(s)!!! How many times have you ‘crashed’??? I’m not talking about just the highs and lows that come with bipolar… I mean, seriously, all out, ‘crash’… Is it just me that has crashed so many times??? Is it just me that has had to go in the psych ward every 3 months at one point??? I know I’m not… I know there are other people… But I’m just curious… How many times have you crashed or been in the hospital???

God bless!!!

2 thoughts on “A follow up question for YOU about the inevitable “Crash”

  1. I do not know how many times I’ve crashed as I went sooo long without the diagnosis and help I needed (30 years). When I had children, it all came crashing down and I was rarely manic but fell into the dark abyss many times a week if not a day. It was largely parenting and teaching (small children) that drove me down because of the unpredictable nature of humans in general and children in particular. After 5 years of being medicated, Sammi, I am still oscillating between taking care of myself and saying Fuck off to myself. I don’t know if that will ever stop. There seems to be a teenager in my body still, the one saying I don’t want to be like everyone else and get better. Minds work in crazy ways, no pun intended. Thanks for questioning.

    Meredith, http://thedailybipolar.blogspot.com

  2. Thanks Sammi for your complete honesty and sharing w/our readers that bipolar is a very serious and often times difficult mental illness to treat.
    I have crashed a few times myself. Bipolar is not a “black & white” illness. I believe there are degrees of symptoms etc.
    I’ve been hospitalized twice, those were major crashes. I’ve had some serious relapses that didn’t land me in the hospital, but it was a close call each time.
    So no you are not alone, I believe as you do that there are many other people who have bipolar & have crashed more than once.

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