Bipolar War – a poem

My mind is a battle field
My thoughts are at war
A chemical imbalance
Destroyed more and more

Up raging tears held
Down in disbelief
And mistakes made,
Will this ever seize?

I have a secret weapon
That I intend to use
If I can remember
Where It is
The battle I won’t loose

I look all around me
But there is nothing,
No secret weapon do I see
It is now I remember
This secret weapon
Is hidden deep eternally

Agony triggers bullets
Between self hate
And helplessness

I’m no good to the world
And don’t want anyone
To know that I feel like this

Slowly and painfully
Thoughts argue sanity
My secret weapon- self acceptance and self love

Lashes through every torn thought,
Every triggered wound,
Leaving battle wounds and
Conquering a slow pace of acceptance

I love myself; I love this life because I matter to ME.
I matter to me because I want to.
I cannot change my agony,
But I can change the way
I deal with it.
I’m alone in my thoughts in my head
But not alone in this illness that others have.

written By Julie Pittman

7 thoughts on “Bipolar War – a poem

  1. That’s a wonderful poem, Julie. You’re not alone in this. I know it can feel otherwise, but we are good to the world. I’m glad you’ve been able to find self-love in all of this.

  2. Jules shared this poem with me awhile ago along with some of her other poems. She has a real talent for expressing herself through words. Thanks for sharing Julie, and I hope that you continue to write, Vicky……….

  3. Thanks guys!, I wrote this poem when I was going through therapy after moving to phoenix the first time,in 2006. Seems whenever I have an out of state move things go haywire. Writing poetry has really helped me through some rough times.

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