~~~~~ Having Bipolar illness, what symptom do you suffer from the most? ~~~~~
You would think that such a simple, straightforward question would have basically the same simple straightforward answer wouldn’t you? I mean the prefix of the word bipolar itself simply means two. So really, how many answers could there be?
There is absolutely nothing simple about Bipolar Disorder. You could ask me this question every day for a week and I can pretty much guarantee you that each day my answer will be different. I know some of you are asking how can that be, if you’re bipolar you’re either simply sad and depressed or happy and exuberant.
Oh how I wish it were that simple!! It’s true that bipolar causes changes in mood and some of the basic qualifying criteria for a diagnosis is that a person has had at least one episode of mania and one episode of depression. This is an extremely simplified explanation. And then of course there different types of Bipolar Disorder: you have Bipolar1, Bipolar1/Mixed, Bipolar 2, Cyclothymia and Bipolar NOS (not otherwise specified). All of this can get very technical so I like to let the Psychiatrists take care of that end of the business.
No matter the type of bipolar a person is, almost all the symptoms are similar and even the same, but the way each person experiences them can be different.
I would have to say for myself the way I experience depression can change from one day to the next and even at times change from one hour to the next. I can be anxious, irritable and feel such sadness or I cry and sob uncontrollably and then there are days when I’m depressed I feel as though I’m in a deep dark pit with no way out and I just want it to end. The point is depression can rear its ugly head in so many forms. My episodes of depression are just as individual as I am.
As with my depression, whether I am experiencing mild mania or a full-blown manic episode, my symptoms can always manifest themselves in so many different ways. I have been euphoric to the point I believe I can do anything!! Sometimes I’m just a happy little chatterbox (I think this is the one that drives my family nuts)…seriously I just won’t shut up! And I tend to get agitated very easily over simple things, my brain won’t turn off and it’s like an iPod in my head that gets stuck on the same song or worse the same verse over and over……. Mania can be highly overrated!
Gee we haven’t even talked about my anxiety and panic attacks!! A panic attack will bring me down like nothing else. I become non functional except to pace, wring my hands and hyperventilate. Even once my respirations are back down to with in normal limits sometimes I can’t even speak for a few minutes. I’m really not a fan of panic attacks.
Even as I’m still trying to type this up my mood has gone from ok this morning to pretty good in the afternoon/evening….but now at a little after 3 AM I have all the not good stuff going on in my head…
So in answer to your question I guess all my symptoms give me a hard time when they think they can get away with it ~~~~~ but I will keep on going.