Or is that a rhetorical question?
I don’t complain much about money if I can help it … I am mostly to blame for most of my money troubles in the first place. Past poor financial decisions always come back to haunt you, and on a fairly regular basis.
HOWEVER, these past three years have been spent trying to recover from our idiocy as young adults. Because of this, it becomes so frustrating when when money becomes an issue. It’s like, “Okay! We’re really working hard here! Can we get a frockin break already!?!?!”
This week alone we’ve had BOTH our cars take a crap on us, one needed new brakes, the other a fuel pump. I mean really? BOTH cars in one week.
Then an account that we cancelled billed us anyways … UGH And sure they refunded … which will be in our account in 7 to 10 days of course.
It feels like no matter how hard we word to get ahead, we just keep falling two more steps behind.
Thus this week has been spend quite down in the dumps. I’ve wrestled with blaming myself, blaming my husband, blaming the universe.
For the first time in YEARS I actually felt like giving up. Not on life or anything … just on trying. What’s the point right? Sure things will work out and they will get better, but won’t they just get worse again? There has got to be a way to alter that cycle, or at the very least, can the better times just last a WEE bit longer than the worse ones?
All this. All these thoughts. All this angst. All this melancholy.
And only one thing to blame.
Money is one of the worst triggers for me. It was actually part of what put me in the hospital 4 years ago. I know they say money can’t buy happiness … but it sure as hell helps AID in our happiness! Because I know for a fact that it can buy UNhappiness! (And at the AMAZING price of FREE!)
How about you? Is money a trigger for your moods? Is it a tiny trigger, or one of the biggest?
*disclaimer* I KNOW that I shouldn’t be upset because I do have many things to be grateful for. Unfortunately, when triggered into a depression from money or the lack there of, it is so hard to remember that it could be worse. It’s not a selfish thing or a ungrateful issue. It’s an issue of my brain being unable to comprehend that there is anything worse than RIGHT NOW. Not one of my finer qualities … I know *disclaimer*