Why I love AaB – Compliments of Jen

Why I<3 AaB…

Have you ever walked through life constantly feeling misunderstood? You’re the outcast that no one wants to get to know for fear of what may happen. You’re the crazy one in your school and those who are nice enough to befriend you must have done so out of pity because you’re the charity case. You have friends just so they can feel better about themselves, not because they truly care. You’re the freak. You’re the kid with bipolar.

That was me before Ask A Bipolar.

I try to remain optimistic. I try to tell myself that this isn’t really what my life is like, that people care. As soon as I begin to believe, I get thrown into the mud once again and come up dirty.

I’ve always had this illness, but I was just recently diagnosed. When I received the correct diagnosis there were “friends” who stopped talking to me. My freak side was clearly exposed. In the movies and media you hear about all the bad things people do when they have bipolar. You never hear about all the wonderful things that come with such a shammed illness. No one tells you that most bipolar people are creative and intelligent and very sensitive to the outside world which makes them extremely observant. You never hear about the wonderful things that come with this illness.

I found support though AaB on their website and Facebook out of desperation. I was going through transitions in employment which had left me without health insurance and thus without any kind of treatment. That’s what happens when you make “too much money”.

I’m not quite sure how I found the support online. At the time my life was a blur. I do remember the sense of relief I felt after chatting with some of the people I met thought the Ask A Bipolar support group on Facebook. These are people who understand and truly care! Everyone in this atmosphere is like me! They all have bipolar!

I had similar feelings when I found the website for the first time. I found myself saying, “Exactly!!” a lot!

It’s the most wonderful thing in the world to know that you’re not alone, to realize people do care and that you’re not a freak! I’ve been connected to this site and the people I’ve met since finding it and for good reason. Other people like me are sometimes hard to find because of the stigma we are all fighting so hard against. There are many out there who fear telling others they have the illness because of the negative stigma that surrounds it and I admit that I sometimes fall into that category. We are not “bipolar”. We have “bipolar”. Just because we have this illness it doesn’t make us freaks!

Yes it’s true that there are many who may never understand me. It’s true that when some people find out I have bipolar they will run for the hills. It’s also true that since Ask A Bipolar is around people like me can find peace and understanding. Sometimes through the AaB Facebook support group I can find a friend at 3am when one is really needed. Hopefully when someone else is having a dark day I can be there for them too. 🙂

Thank you to all my true friends for sticking around. Thank you to AaB for being around so that more friends can be made.

So here I am…whole, at peace, with friends and not a freak…all because of Ask a Bipolar! 😀

4 thoughts on “Why I love AaB – Compliments of Jen

  1. I want to learn all i can about Bipolar Depression.My doctor, years ago, told me i was Manic Depressive. I assumed it had to do with hormones and PMS. The more i study this, the more i can see the many ways i’ve been effected through the years. This last episode of depression was the longest and deepest i’ve ever known. There were several contributing factors.I’m also Hypoglycemic. Diet and stress both efffect that. There was also a embarressing misunderstanding that occured. Anyway,the combition caused a lot of changes.If by telling this, it helps someone be more aware,to seek treament,and not be where i’ve been and where i am now,it is worth telling.

  2. As the rest of my friends including my twin brother were enjoying their freshman year at college, I remember staring out of the window of the mental ward I was in and asking, “why me?” I’d always been a bit of an odd man out, but never a total outcast. I was always kind of somewhere in the middle. But as if space aliens had plucked me out of my dorm room and dropped me off in this ward, I was there if liked it or not. As I got better, I came to appreciate that my friends who were partying that semester would never get to experience the bizarre and interesting journey my three week manic episode took me on. After initially feeling extreme embarrassment being “mentally ill,” I came to the conclusion that my bipolar was a gift of heightened senses, kinda like a superpower… I finally understood that when it wasn’t treated it could do great damage. But what we all in common is a great gift, not unlike the power of shamans of native american lore. When we are well we are able to use this power and do amazing things like set up a web site like http://www.askabipolar.com or write an amazing book that can help people. When I feel a little odd or strange (which is often) I like to remember that Abraham Lincoln, Florence Nightingale, even Princess Leia (Carrie Fisher)…and countless other amazing people have used their gift of heightened senses to change the world and even galaxies!

    http://www.mental-health-today.com/bp/famous_people.htm

    Jen, thanks for the post!
    Pete

  3. Hello! I an 37 and i was diagnosed with type 2 bipolar/cyclothymia about 18 months ago, since then i was able to understand through this diagnostic all the ups and downs in my life. But to be honest, i now see bipolar (atleast in my case) as a blessing !!!

    The problem however is the environment and people around us. Negativity and stress creates depression in us, when positivity and love inspire us and make us become better person. Understanding the diagnostic and how hypersensitive to feelings and senses we are is paramount. These days i can detect negative vives so easily, i could in the past too i think but i just stupidly let them rub off onto me and reacted by becoming negative myself ! These days i jus ESCAPE the source of negative vibes as i dont want to be “contaminated”. Instead every day i follow the same routine, if i can’t get near positive people then i use the Interne to listen to inspiring music including meditation and watch inspiring videos from comedians, scientists etc.

    By the way you should have a look into Consciousness, Quantum physics and Quantum computation you will see how much connected us bipolar are from anything Quantum !! Our brains in fact are just like Quantum computers: when in hypomanic mode, we operate in a timeless world where everything is possible, where we are ONE with the universe ! 🙂

    Those videos really inspired me, they might also for you if your brain ticks like mine:

    http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=2911199841702354668#docid=1357936448486290920

    http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=2911199841702354668#

    A great source of weekly inspiration and fun is the Joe Rogan podcast:
    http://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-joe-rogan-experience/id360084272

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7o4O3U220GE
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1w9s39IG0PI&feature=fvst
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gu-IXjPrsC4&feature=related

    Best regards

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