So I’m all super excited about getting this site up and rockin again. Yet I also know there is much to be done to get it to that rockin state again. Thus the lack of motivation. I mean it’s quite the daunting task before me. And not one that I can really get any help for as it’s all me things. Me things kinda suck.
So my question for you friends is, how do you regain that motivation after it has been lost for so long? What must I do to get all pumped up about a massive amount of catching up to do while not being discouraged about falling so behind?
Ever been here? What did you do to get out?
Link to this post!
julie
September 10, 2011
10:42 am
Marybeth, That is a tough one! but let me first say, I think you are far more motivated then you give yourself credit for,I use to go atleast a week without even feeling motivated to take a shower or leave the house. I think for me though,visualization of the end result,When trying to catch up with responsibilities that I have unwound,i just start over from scratch. And I always make sure to delegate my time so that i have enough ME time,(not a current obstacle)ex:If I have a balloon that’s filled with helium I’m constantly holding on,so it doesn’t fly away,and when it does start to fly away I have to chase after it,if I let it go completely,the only thing for me to do replace where i was,is to get another balloon,and cant catch it i cant keep up with whats been lost,so i have to change things around me so i dont lose that balloon,less to distract me,(i get a lot of distractions, i think im ADD,oh sorry this is a distraction),music is always a great motivatior,and having support to delegate my needs/wants is important for my mental health. also structure is key-much love~jules i hope this helps,sorry if it didnt
Reply
angel smith
September 10, 2011
11:17 am
I went thru a 2 yr depression as a lot of you already know, so believe me letting things go is something I got good at. And Julie, I totally understand the lack of motivation about not taking a shower. When I was in that depression there would be times I couldnt even remember the last time I HAD taken a shower, sad I know. Modivation for me at that time finally came when I looked in the face of my children and they started asking why I was always “sick”, why was mommy always laying on the couch/in bed? So here’s how I started getting things done. I made a list… a mental list mostly, sometimes a literal list (whatever helped at the time) of what needed to be done, and I started down the list one at a time. No matter how daunting the task or how simple, when I came to it on the list, I did it. I just took a deep breath and jumped right in. Sometimes it helped to take a step back first and look at what was in front of me. Sometimes it helped to just close my eyes and run into it full force. It honestly depended on my mood level at the time. Music does help. If I’m feeling especially low on energy I’ll put something on to get the blood pumping to sort of juice me up. Now, when I am feeling less than motivated, I sometimes use the music, sometimes use the lists, but most importantly its always in the back of my head that no matter what the task is I dont want to be a failure in my childrens eyes. Even if they dont know about what I am doing. I use that as motivation. “IF” they knew about it, what would they think of my progress, would they be proud of what I was doing? Would I measure up to their expectations of me? My youngest daughter, she’s 6, she tells me “you’re the best mommy in the world”. I know what I may be doing at the time may not have anything to do with my “mommying” skills, but to me in her eyes am I accomplishing what needs to be accomplished? or am I failing? Because failure in my childrens eyes is unexceptable to me. That is my motivation. Even if it never really matters to them what I might be doing at the time, it matters to me that it might one day effect them.
Reply
Chelle
September 10, 2011
2:08 pm
Marybeth,
I agree with what Julie said and it was what I was going to say. I wrote about it in my hypomania post. You make a list and you tackle it one thing at a time. Just focus on the one thing you have picked (maybe the first thing on the list, maybe not) and just DO it. If you can finish just one thing, then you get rolling and start to have the motivation to do something else.
This is hard, especially when you are juggling so many things at once. Maybe it would help to make your list and then post what you need to do on the site? I don’t know, that might be bad for you, but it would be a public accountability thing. Like, I said I was going to do this and I said it ONLINE, so I guess I’d better get it done. But that may or may not be a good idea for you. I have done this on my blog about my spending and it hasn’t exactly curbed my most extreme addiction – downloading kindle books – but now I look for the free or discounted ones as opposed to the ones that cost $15. So, I guess in a way it did help.
Hugs,
Chelle
Reply
julie Reply:
September 17th, 2011 at 3:52 am
That was a good post Chelle,on your hypomania blog. I still havent followeed through on printing that out yet,running low on printer ink.
Reply
Jan Pinkston
September 10, 2011
6:40 pm
Please don’t rush yourself. Too much rushing, to get caught up, may lead to a set back! I know that you are anxious to get back “to it”. BP’s just don’t know how much balanced time they will have. Try to give yourself some “you” time and if you start getting too anxious, try to back off from some of your “have” too’s. It is hard to pace yourself, but you have to try. I have had BP I for over 35 yrs. If I had known how much it helped to try not to set the world on fire, I could have been a little nicer to myself and to my family. When I am over taxed, my first response is anger. Remember you have some fun times ahead -enjoy!
Jan
Reply
nana10x
September 11, 2011
9:53 am
If it’s any consolation, Marybeth, many of us are struggling with similar issues. For those with BPD, it may often be relearning how to self-motivate in the absence of the “ultraspeed energy” the comes with mania. Medication changes the dynamic significantly and tasks that were once “a piece of cake” may be more challenging. It is the irony of BPD! When the out of control manic energy is subdued with the necessary meds….we are, to some degree, like the rest of the world. We have to push to get those mundane tasks accomplished! Also, there is always the danger that we are slipping into a little depression Self awareness of our imbalances helps us to reset our priorities, etc. and more importantly, to NOT beat ourselves up. I try to view my actions clinically, not emotionally, and to listen to the voice that says….”don’t think about how much is left to be done; just do what you can today.” Getting a few things accomplished is far better than spending the day worrying about how much hasn’t been accomplished or worse, how much needs to be done. I try to stay in the moment, prioritize, and carve out only what I CAN do each day. Like others, I think you are doing a far better job than you give yourself credit for. This site is such a worthwhile project for which I am VERY grateful. Thank you!
Reply
Shari
September 11, 2011
6:02 pm
This is short and to the point. Make a list of all of your obligations. Remove ones you can and put the other ones in order from 1 to 10. 1 being the most important. Is it possible you’ve bitten off more than you can chew? It’s a fine line and only you can make that decision.
Reply
Charlie
September 12, 2011
8:37 am
Bleechh. I can empathise! Sometimes I feel unmotivated because I have no care-factor. I’m just too blah or miserable to feel any excitement about ‘the thing’, whatever that happens to be. Other times, like at the moment, I can visualise what I want and I can even feel a little excited about the prospect, but it’s all just too overwhelming and it saps every bit of motivation from me.
Something that’s really helped me this fortnight is that I decided on a couple of daily tasks that were to be absolutely non-negotiable (we’re talking really embarrassingly simple tasks – for me it has been to clean my kids’ teeth every day and to take the washing out of the machine as soon as the cycle has finished!!). I’ve tried not to focus too much on the gazillion things that I’ve neglected and this has given me just enough momentum to start tackling a few other things. Less overwhelmed and definitely more motivated. Any progress is good progress.
I hope you’re not too discouraged! This setback is just a tiny part of the big picture. It’ll become just a tiny blip when you look back on the website’s journey… unless you burn yourself out. Take care. We believe in you!
Reply
julie Reply:
September 17th, 2011 at 3:49 am
That is great advice Charlie, Im so unorganized.
Reply